Sunday, January 14, 2007

Score $250 M for Scientology

A friend recently asked what I made of the David Beckham decision to come to the United States and play futbol for the LA Galaxy for $250 million. I demurred, claiming not to think anything in particular. Well, leave it to me (courtesy of the NY Daily News) to mix religion into this.

The New York Daily News is reporting that David Beckham spent hours consulting with Tom Cruise before making the leap over the pond. Their wives are already inseperable, Posh Beckham is eyeballing a house four doors down from the Cruise's and here's the kicker: The Cruises are attempting to sell the Beckham's on Scientology.

If the Cruises are into Scientology then dragging in their closest associates is a given. Scientologists are like Seventh-Day-Adventists on steroids. Your humble blogmaster has some experience with this "religion." I use quotes around the word religion becuase it is described as one and Scientology uses tax exemption laws intended for religions. Apparently there are beliefs held by the practicioners that attempt to explain salvation but I never was familiar with this end of the business.

From my experience Scientology is a sort of amalgum of human performance enhancement courses wrapped around Amway hard sell tactics and couched in specialized jargon designed to disconnect the inquirer and devotee from critical thought. The end game is to create economic slaves who dump all their money into the religion and try to recruit others into dumping their money into the religion.

The NY Daily News both report that Katie Holmes-Cruise and Victoria "Posh" Beckham were raised as Roman Catholics, so we need to pray especially hard for them. Perhaps only after their bank accounts have been emptied out and after the ruination of their husband's careers will these women will come to realize that Scientology is no substitute for a life centered on humble prayer, fear of the Lord and refuge in the Sacraments.


Anonymous said...

You know, for a Christian you play the Ninth Commandment kina loosely.

First of all, the Beckham stories you quote so flippantly as rock-solid fact are in fact gossip-fodder from the worst tabloids in the UK.

Secondly, your comparison of Scientologists and Seventh-Day Adventists shows you have ab-so-lu-te-ly no clue what Scientology is about.

Thirdly, you are quite correct in that Scientology is "no substitute for a life centered on humble prayer, fear of the Lord and refuge in the Sacraments" - Scientology DOES NOT SEEK to be a substitute. If anything, it tends to bring people closer to their spiritual beliefs. In the case of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, it's the media that keeps pretending they were both "devout catholics" who "converted" to Scientology. In actual fact they were both agnostics long before any acquaintance with the Scientology philosophy. We're not stealing from your flock, Thomas.

Scientologist and proud of it


Wow, how did a scientologist hunt this post down?
I only found it through Gerald Augustinius's blog. Glad I did though, as i had completely forgotten what the Beckhams and the Cruise's close relationship could mean.

Now Greg,
First, Beckham moving to US is a fact confirmed by the man himself.
Second, given that you took the SDA remark as a direct comparison between the cults shows you have ab-so-lu-te-ly no clue what he was talking about. I'll fill you in: Zealous Craziness.
Thirdly, Yes you do claim to be a religion when you think you can get away with it, you also claim to be an alternative to psychology, a self-help group or whatever it takes to get your badly written Xenu fairytales to the vulnerable and needy.

Praise Xenu! or wait, is it Xemu? You know, not even a DC8 could carry enough LSD to make scientology seem sensible. They might be able to carry trillions of aliens to earth though, especially if said aliens have been paralyzed by psychiatrists with alcohol/glycol combinations.

Seventh Day Adventists on steroids.

Anonymous said...

Greg's use of "proud" sums up his "religion" based in So. Cal.'s Garden of Eden. Greg accurately states that his group "is no substitute for a life centered on humble prayer...[it] DOES NOT SEEK [sic] to be a substitute..." Indeed, Greg, his group and their pride hang on the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil: "But the serpent [my ital] said to the woman, 'No, you shall not die [from eating of the Tree of Knowledge]; for God knows that when you eat of it, your eyes will be opened and you will be like God, knowing good and evil'" (Gen. 3, 4-5)

Thomas Shawn said...

Greg -

Let me address some of your concerns. You say I violate the 9th Commandment.

Well for Roman Catholics and Lutherans the 9th commandment is "thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife." Truth be known, my wife is way better looking than Posh or Katie.

I think you used to be a Protestant or a Jew because their 9th Commandment is Thou Shall Not Bear False Witness. I think this is what you are driving at.

So what false witness did I bear? That Mrs. Beckham and Mrs. Cruise are fast friends, that Mrs. Beckham seeks to live near Mrs. Cruise? That Cruises are seeking to introduce Scientology to the Beckhams?

Yes, this is gossip fodder, if it were harmful I'd not repeat it. This is what blogs do, talk about what is in the news. If I hear a rumour that David will play defence instead of midfield is that also prohibited by the 8th Catholic and 9th Protestant Commandment?

Nowhere in my post did I insinuate that any of the Cruises or Beckhams were devout Roman Catholics. It is a matter of public record, and nothing to be ashamed of, that Mrs. Beckham and Mrs. Cruise grew up in the Roman Catholic Church. What their spiritual practices were before or after joining Scientology is unknown to me.

In fact, the Cruises actually attempted to use a Roman Catholic church in Italy to get married in .... so their daliance with the Church is part of the public record.

I'm not concerned about "my flock" getting nabbed by Scientology. Scientology is is just one iota in a long list of spiritual diseases in this modern age that afflict Roman Catholics ... Scientology as a disease being akin to a toenail fungus, not deadly but more of an annoyance easily cured.

I think the real burr in your saddle is my characterization of Scientology .. and I will swear in a court of law that what I say is true. The religion is very aggressive, not in nasty way, but aggressive. They are focused on money. The use religion tax laws even though they are not a religion.

Thomas Shawn said...

Anonymous -

You captured the Biblical error of Scientology. The religion is definitely based on the attainment of some sort of secret knowledge through the advancement of certain "levels" through much "coursework."